The Ultimate Weakness of Violence

 What follows is a text version of Sunday's sermon. You can hear it here. Apologies for the stuffed up nose...)

I try to pay attention to morning "ear worms." I find that they are almost always some kind of message I should be paying attention to.

This week, on two separate mornings, the "ear worm" I woke to was Jackson Browne's classic "Doctor My Eyes."

"Doctor, my eyes have seen the years
And the slow parade of fears without crying
Now I want to understand
I have done all that I could
To see the evil and the good without hiding
You must help me if you can?
Doctor, my eyes, tell me what is wrong
Was I unwise to leave them open for so long?"

I didn't have to think too long about why this song was given to me as a message. It was clear to me that it's all about the rampant violent rhetoric and speech of our culture right now.

This week, I looked head on at some of the facts of violent speech and action in our country. First, I read a chilling report from the Southern Poverty Law Association about the skyrocketing rise in violent fringe groups. I also found some other facts about violence against government offices.

Several facts:

• Anti-immigrant groups have soared by over 80 percent in recent years. (above link)
• "Nativist Extremist Groups" --organizations that go beyond mere advocacy of restrictive immigration policy to actually confront or harass suspected immigrants — jumped from 173 groups in 2008 to 309 last year. (above link)
• Patriot movement and its paramilitary wing, the militias, have also skyrocketed. An astonishing 363 new Patriot groups appeared in 2009, with the totals going from 149 groups (including 42 militias) to 512 (127 of them militias) — a 244% jump. (above link)
• The US Marshall service has released a study showing that threats to the judiciary have more than doubled in the past six years.
• Reports from Secret Service sources claim that threats against President Obama are more than 400 percent HIGHER than threats against President Bush.

"Doctor, my eyes, tell me what is wrong
Was I unwise to leave them open for so long?"

Much of this, I found in one long and deeply disturbing report, called an "Insurrectionist Timeline." You can find it here. Yes, I was indeed compiled by those wishing to reduce handgun violence. But, even if you factor out the incidents simply dealing with that issue, and just read the other threats and actions against government officials in the past two years, you will find this to be a shocking list.

"Doctor, my eyes, tell me what is wrong
Was I unwise to leave them open for so long?"

Despite this overwhelming statistical evidence that there is a clear and convincing growing threat from fringe groups on the far right of our country, I know many out there would be quick to point out that hate speech and action comes from the left too. And it most assuredly does.

Just this week, I read on Facebook this week about disturbing death threats that are coming to Sarah Palin after her vlog about the Tuscon shootings. Things got especially horrible on Twitter, where someone created a four-minute montage of truly horrendous things people have said about her.

Here are just four of the dozens, possible hundreds, out there:

"My hatred for Sarah Palin continues to grow... I think this woman should be assassinated."
"I hope she dies, gnashing her teeth."
"Can somebody shoot Sarah Palin?"
"I wish no violence upon her....just an inoperable tumor is all."

If you can stomach it, here is a link to the whole four minute video. I found it deeply disturbing.

And while horrid tweets are clearly several steps away from organized hate groups plotting rebellion, it's also clearly out there and must be condemned by all.

"Doctor, my eyes, tell me what is wrong
Was I unwise to leave them open for so long?"

As I said last week, it doesn't really matter to me which "side" is doing it more, it's clear that it's pervasive in the culture right now. And it's clear that in our age of instant communication, incidences that used to take months, maybe years, to filter out into the culture (or maybe never....) are how broadcast world wide in a matter of seconds.

Nor does it matter to me whether you agree with my assertion of last week that the violent rhetoric of our culture --that stew of hate boiling out there in so many places-- had a connection to the shooting in Tuscon.

I continue to maintain that the two are related, through the issue of who we are as a culture. Not who the shooter is/was, but who we are....what kind of people...what kind of nation we have become.

But even if you don't agree with that assertion, I still believe talking about, and confronting, the violent rhetoric of our culture is something we can all do something about. In fact, it's really the only thing we can all individually do something about.

We cannot, on our own, change handgun laws.
We cannot, on our own, increase services for the mentally ill.

But we CAN, all of us, control what we say, and consider how our words can affect others. Which makes it the most important thing we can all individually do.

Along these lines, I so appreciated what the President said to the nation this week, calling us to consider whether or not our our speech and actions are worthy of those who have been killed; and asking us whether our speech or actions are worthy of the nine-year-old girl. That's a pretty decent moral barometer for our political speech, really.

But it seems to me an even better reminder for our "way forward" as a nation comes from Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., who the nation celebrates this very weekend.

It's no doubt true that Dr. King would have many things to say about what's happening in our world today. One of my favorite quotes from Dr. King is on this very subject of violence and hate. It came near the end of his life, in a piece called "Where Do We Go From Here?"

"The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. Instead of diminishing evil, it multiplies it. Through violence you may murder the liar, but you cannot murder the lie, nor establish the truth. Through violence you may murder the hater, but you do not murder hate. In fact, violence merely increases hate. So it goes. ... Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that."

As you know, Dr. King was deeply committed to the principles of non-violent resistance in his speech and his action. But did you know that even he struggled with principles of non-violence early in his public life? In fact, some argue that it was not Martin Luther King Jr. who should be properly credited with fostering non-violence within the Civil Rights movement, but someone else entirely: an African American man named Bayard Rustin.

Bayard Rustin was considered by many to be "the Socrates of the Civil Rights movement." He was a committed pacifist who went to jail for that belief, an act that inspired later Civil Rights leaders to be willing to go to jail for their beliefs.

By 1963, Bayard Rustin was one of the key advisors to Dr. King, and one of the driving forces behind the March on Washington. People have called him the architect of the march. But it's something that happened in February of 1956 that perhaps set the future course for the Civil Rights movement and the work of Martin Luther King Jr. It was during the bus boycott of Montgomery, and event that did not seem to be going well. People had invited Rustin to come and meet with Dr. King and discuss how to reinvigorate the action.

Bayard Rustin arrived to meet with King and was horrified to find both armed guards at the front door of the place King was staying, and guns throughout the house as well. Rustin pushed hard on Martin Luther King and those around him on the following concept: that IF they were to truly be people of non-violence, then they must live it in all facets of life, including getting rid of armed guards and handguns.

There was a great bit of discussion in the movement about this. As you might imagine, some considered it to be quite dangerous. But King agreed, and it apparently deeply changed the movement. Non-violence was now not just WORDS, but deeply embedded in their day-to-day actions.

By the way, one more fact about Bayard Rustin that probably many of you already know: he was gay. He was gay in a time when it could often be dangerous to be open about that. And he was open about that. It often put him at odds with other leaders of the Civil Rights Movement, who feared that he could compromise their work. He was openly denounced and harassed for his orientation during this period.

Later in life Bayard Rustin was very clear that the movement for LGBT rights was an extension of the movement for African-American Civil Rights.

How far we have come since that day that Bayard Rustin convinced King to live without guns! Today, as you can see from the "Insurrectionist Timeline," all too often groups and individual pulls out the threats of violence early on. People flaunt side arms at presidential rallies and politicians talk about "second amendment solutions."

Can we be clear on this next sentence? (I've bolded it)

"Second amendment solutions" and Dr. King's vision of a non-violent social change, are not compatible visions.

They may both be "American" visions. But they are different visions. One puts ultimate trust in politics through violence. Because, whether this is ever acknowledged by the advocates of any "gun-related" solutions or any "second amendment" solutions,  they are, by definition, social change built on an ideal of violence.

The other, Dr. King's vision of non-violent social change is built on the radical idea of God's love for all people, and of God's justice for all. It comes through a radical trust in both God's love and the power of non-violent behavior and action itself...not on bullets or violent speech. In fact, please note the passion King has for pointing out that hate cannot drive out hate...only love can. He radically lived this in his life. He called us all to this life too.

In last Sunday's Gospel lesson, John points toward Jesus, and proclaiming him as the coming Messiah. And twice in the text, John uses the same phrase:

"Behold the Lamb of God...."

It's an interesting phrase for John to using so early into Jesus' ministry. Jesus has hardly begun preaching or teaching anything. But right here, in some of the first acclamations of Jesus in the Gospels, is a hint of Jesus' role as the one who gave himself non-violently, who gave himself without precondition.

Jesus is the one who told his friends, "put away your swords....those who live by the sword shall died by the sword."

Or, as Martin Luther King said centuries later:

"Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that."

Living by such radical non-violence is not without cost. As we have seen in King's case (or in Jesus')  it can get you killed.

But the message of the Gospel is that no hate can ever finally overcome love. No death can finally overcome God's new life. No despair is stronger than God's sense of hope. In a world of fear, anger, mistrust, and recrimination, there IS another Way...

Despite the anger, despite the endless "you do it more that I do" accusations, there IS a different Way. And my fervent hope and prayer that precisely because this is something we can all work on as individuals, that this is something we will all work on as individuals.

On your own, you may never get great and lasting legislation passed.
On your own, you may never lead a great social movement for change

But YOU can help change the tone of our rhetoric by your own personal choices.

People who disagree with you politically are not your enemies. They just disagree with you politically. We must find a way to change the feeling and tone in what we say to each other, and how we talk to each other. We must find a day to recapture a respect for those who serve in our government at all levels, for those who put themselves on the line each day simply by serving the people.
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

One final story from another time...not so long ago, but apparently a long time ago.
 I heard a story this this week from the time after President Reagan was shot. As you may recall, Reagan was shot and a bullet lodged inside of him, very near his heart. After he came out of surgery, one of the first visitors to see him was Speaker of the House, Tip O'Neil.

Never were there two more opposites, politically...the old Massachusetts liberal....the old California conservative. They had, in a sense, fought each other for decades. They were both now old men, near the end of not just their careers, but their lives.

But they  had also made a pact, those two, that even though they deeply disagreed with each other and each other's vision for the nation, they would be friends. And, once 6 pm rolled around each day, they would put down the rhetoric and embrace each other.

So, Reagan had been shot. And Tip O'Neil comes to see him. They embrace. Tip O'Neil kisses Reagan on the head. And these two old political "enemies" take each other by the hands, and in unison recite the 23rd Psalm.

"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside the still waters..."

It's a beautiful vision of what has been, and what could be, again in our nation, among our leaders.

For those of us within the Church, may we be able to re-embrace Jesus' compassion and love for all, for his reminder to "put away your sword."

For all of us, may we be reminded again of Dr. King's words that, finally, only love can drive out hate.

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The Word and our words

(A sermon delivered at Northaven United Methodist Church, Sunday January 9th, 2011. Apologies for any and all typos. Let me know and I'll correct them...)

Listen to it here.

This morning, I am weary. This morning, I am tired.

This morning, I am, in a sense, without adequate words, once again. I am talking, of course, about events that took place in Arizona, just over 24-hours ago. I have to tell you, I didn't want to talk about this today. I didn't want to HAVE to.

I'm tired right now. It's been a little busy around here the last few weeks. But more than this, anytime somebody who works for the government is shot or killed, it hits a bit close to home. So, no, I didn't want to say a thing today.

But then, yesterday afternoon, I read a blog from historian and theologian, Diana Butler Bass. She emphatically implores minister to *not* avoid the subject this morning....to speak out....to preach out...on events in Arizona.

Here's some of what she had to say:

"...pulpits should be places to reflect on theology and life, on the Word and our words.  I hope that sermons tomorrow will go beyond expressions of sympathy or calls for civility and niceness.  Right now, we need some sustained spiritual reflection on how badly we have behaved in recent years as Americans--how much we've allowed fear to motivate our politics, how cruel we've allowed our discourse to become, how little we've listened, how much we've dehumanized public servants, how much we hate."(underlining added for emphasis)

I know she's right.

And then, it got worse. Then, I remembered that today is "Baptism of the Lord" Sunday. We read the Gospel lesson about Jesus' baptism. And in most years we use this passage to remind ourselves not only about Jesus' baptism, but also about our own.

Baptism is that primary authorizing event in the Christian Church. Far more profoundly and completely than ordination or consecration, baptism is THE act that authorizes ALL of us to act in God's name as the Church.
And THEN, I remembered  the baptism ritual. It's something on page 34, and on page 40 of the hymnal. It's the same both places, so feel free to turn there now. It's the questions that we ask of people who come for baptism, either as adults...or, if they come as children, we ask their children.

And, right there, take a look at the second question:
"Do you accept the freedom and power God gives you to resist evil, injustice, and oppression in whatever forms they present themselves?"

You see, dear friends, right here in this ritual we find a very important challenge that each of us. Baptized people, people of faith, are called to resist evil, injustice, and oppression in whatever forms they present themselves.

THIS is a part of our calling, through baptism. It's a part of all of our calling, and it comes to us through the fact that we are baptized. This is a part of our calling, those of us who are preachers.

And so, dear friends, we will speak of this today. We will speak of it. Because Diana Butler Bass asked...because Jesus calls us to it, we will speak about, as she says "The WORD" and our words.

But I am weary. I am tired. And I am terribly terribly sad.

Many times in the past 24-hours, I have read a politician or pundit talk about how "Shocked, surprised, and saddened" they are about these events in Arizona.

So, you might wonder: am I surprised? Am I shocked? Am I saddeded?
Saddened? Yes. Deeply. Truly. Profoundly.

But am I shocked? Surprised?

NO. No, I am not shocked. No, I am not ONE BIT surprised. I didn't WANT such things to happen. Or yearn for it. Or hope for it. But, no, I am not shocked.

I am not shocked that after years and years(decades, really) of  hateful and inciteful rhetoric against government employees a lone gunman chose what should be unthinkable in our society. Angry political words --a climate of hate that many politicians and preachers say they have never seen-- has led a lone disfunctional persons to attempt to kill a member of congress, and and actually kill six people, including a nine-year-old child and a federal judge.

No. No, I am NOT shocked by this. And it grieves me deeply to say that.
And, you know what? I am curious about you. I wonder if you'd be willing to answer this question out loud....this morning, are you shocked? (the congregation responded "No.")

Because, as people of faith, we've been here before and we've been here often. Here in sermons, we've talked about the WORD and we've talked about our "words." This is a part of why I am weary. I've preached before about hateful incindiary political speech before right here in this pulpit. I preached about it during the presidential campaign. I preached about it with during the health care debate. I've preached about it with regard to the demeaning language our society uses to describe immigrants or LGBT people. Last Fall, I talked about it with respect to bullying.

But, friends, you know it's not just me. We've been talking about this for decades here at Northaven. You know what I'm talking about. November, 1963. The sermon that likely changed the future history of this church. Rev. Bill Holmes stood in the Northaven church pulpit and decried the hateful fearmongering of that time. Two days after Kennedy was assassinated here, Rev. Holmes asked a question that has echoed down the decades: "In God's name, what kind of city have we become?!"

It makes us weary to have to remember how long ago that was, how much we had hoped we had changed from being that society. But instead  we can easily extrapolate that four-decades-old question, and ask "In God's name, what kind of NATION have we become?"

What kind of nation do we live in when this kind of violence is SO UTTERLY predictable that we are NOT surprised?

You might say, "But, Eric, what if we later learn that this shooter was a left-wing nut-job? What if he was a Obama fan? What if he was a McCain fan? What if he liked the Tea Party? What if he liked Greenpeace?"

I will say to you now: it won't matter.
In fact, I am grateful I can preach this sermon today before I learn too much about this person. Because it helps me make the point that it doesn't matter. Always after such shootings, we imagine that we'll be able to BLAME solely on the derrainged mind of one person, and within that that we can blame it on some "cause" in his life...his politics...or his parents....or the music he listened to...we look to blame it solely on him, or anybody else....except US.

But see, dear friends, I don't really care to know much more about him. I think I know just about everything I need to know. From the little I've read, he sounds dissociative. More than a little "off." He was a person, near the edge, who was driven to do something horrible.

And THE REAL question, dear friends, is not "Who was HE?"
THE question is: "Who are WE?"

In God's name, what kind of nation have we become? Who are we? And, here within the church, we must ask: how have we, as people of the WORD, stood by as society's "words" got so out of hand?

On that late November Sunday in 1963, from very this pulpit, Rev. Holmes noted that  during President Kennedy's visit, all over the City of Dallas, there were posters that said "Wanted for Treason" and featured a picture of John F. Kennedy....with a target over his head.

Did those pictures kill Kennedy? No. Did they contribute to an atmosphere where the poisoned rhetorical air drove Oswald over the edge? Yes. Yes, they did. And that was his point in that day. His point, as a pastor, was to call people to account for the hateful, vengeful speech and attitudes that had been allowed to flourish.

And in our time, my calling as pastor of the current Northaven is similar. Through my baptism, I am called to speak against "evil, injustice, and oppression."  I heed Diana Butler Bass' call to talk not only about the WORD, but about our words. I feel compelled to share the following thoughts...

In our day, national politicians have sponsored  websites with targets on them. Gun targets, aimed over certain congressional districts, including the congressional district of Rep. Gabrielle Giffords. Those same websites encouraged people to "don't retreat, just reload." A coded message to a lone gunman that could not be clearer.

In our day, before last Fall's elections, Senatorial candidates were promising that if the election didn't go their way, people ought to consider a "second amendment solution." It's quite clear: if you don't like the outcome of the election, take up arms against the government. A coded message to a lone gunman that could not be clearer.

In our day, so-called patriot groups all over the country are quoting an obscure passage from Jefferson that says, "The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants."  A coded message to a lone gunman that could not be clearer.

In fact, many of these messages are hardly coded, are they? They overtly call for violence. And it is time for our nation to repent.

So, no, I am not surprised that given this constant bombardment of demeaning language...given thousand of other examples I could cite --but won't because we'd be here until next week-- given the constant bombardment of negative language toward our elected officials, one lone, dissociative person listened to it, and went over the edge.

It's been going on for decades. For more than two decades now, members our elected government have spoken about the government, and government service, in extraordinarily negative ways. We have used violent language to describe what we have wanted to do with the government and governmental workers. It has allowed us to see government workers as less than human.

By the way, theologically, this dynamic of dehumanization has been with us a long time, less we forget. Let's remember that in Jesus' day, some of the most hated people in his society were those pejoratively called "Tax Collectors." In the New Testament, "tax collectors" becomes a kind of short-hand code for evil people that others are allowed to hate. But, it's also the kind of person Jesus comes to associate WITH...to LOVE,,,,to see, through his baptism, to RE-humanize. People have been dehumanizing government workers for decades, using hateful speech.

You see, friends, our words DO matter. It matters what we say. Political speech does matter. Think about this: if it didn't would we be spending millions and millions of dollars on political campaigns?! Politicians and corporations know that incindiary political speech works. That's why they spend so much for the right to speak out. They know that speech can move people to action...to vote....to join a social movement. Words do matter.

This is why I am weary of the questions reporters ask. After something like this event, they always ask something like, "Well, do you think your use of violent language could contribute to violent action?"
And, of course, they politicians always say, "No, of course it doesn't."

Well, what do you expect them to say? Of course they'll deny that! Look, dear reporters, everybody already knows speech leads to action. Words lead to behavior. If they didn't, you reporters wouldn't really have a job. The whole reason we have politics..the whole reason we have journalism is because everybody understands that words...thoughts....ideas...always hold within them, the possibility of being transformed into actions...like seeds birthed into life.

The most important questions are moral and theological. The questions to ask politicians, dear reporters, are these: "Are we inciting positive change in society? Or negative change? Is our language violent, and thereby encouraging of violence? Or is our language loving, and thereby encouraging love?"

Because, dear friends, whatever we say begets what we do, and whatever we do begets what we say. Violence (action or speech) begets more violence. Love (actions or speech) begets more love.

And, let me be clear, it is not hateful to call out hate speech. It is not partisan or political to be mentioning this. It is not partisan to disagree with somebody. You are free to tell me it is, but it is not.

Government workers of all kinds are in danger. Rep. Eric Cantor's office has been shot in the past. Rep. Gifford's office was vandalized. Friday, a flaming package was intercepted, intended for Secretary Janet Nepolitano. These acts of violence cut in all directions. And it's time for leaders to renounce them and all us to civility.

Both our President and our new Speaker of the House have both latched on to a phrase that I appreciate: "We can disagree without being disagreeable." I like this phrase quite a bit.

Yes, we can and we must. And there are good people in all political parties. But there are politicians who have used incindiary rhetoric. And their words must be denounced.

It will not be easy, because these habits have become very ingrained in our very political process itself. These demonizing habits are often supported by demonizing rhetoric from Christian churches too. Rather than calling people to civility and love, far too often, preachers have encouraged this same violent rhetoric.
It will not be easy. But it wasn't easy for Jesus either.

Jesus goes straight from his own baptism into the wilderness. It's a jarring series of events. He goes straight from this incredibly powerful moment when the dove descends, the voice speaks, and clearly the Spirit of God is upon him. Jesus goes from this moment, straight into the wilderness to be tempted for forty days. As if to say to us: know that the life in baptism is not easy....there will be great challenges, always. There will be temptations to renounce our calling...or to say silent. But we speak out because God would have us to do so. God would call us to speak against the incendiary rhetoric of our day.

Finally, the last reason I am not surprised by this shooting. I am not surprised because, as you know, I am married to a public official. Saying this is not to make this day about me, or her. But it is to say, it's given us both a unique position to meditate on these issues of the past six years. She works in family court. She sees folks at their absolute worst. She sees just how close to the edge many people are...how even in a courtroom, they can be so enraged as to consider violence.

Things happen every now and then, that I won't go into here. Sufficed to say, these things make you very glad for trained baliffs and security scanners in the lobby. And they remind you of just how close to the edge some people live every day. Walking around the streets of Dallas Texas...walking around the streets of America...there are people close to the edge....just waiting to be pushed by incindiary words.

And I can promise you this...everybody you know who works in government at any level....people who work for the federal, state, and local government...people who work in the courts, the judiciary, and administration...people who work in congress...judges at all levels....heck, even dog catchers and the aforementioned "tax collectors" (remember the IRS building in Austin?)....I guarantee you that around their dinner tables, around their breakfast tables, in the privacy of their bedrooms, they've talked about these things.

They've talked about the very real threats of this kind of violence. They've always known, that's it's always possible. And this morning, all across America, they are not surprised either.

But, friends, they get up every morning, and they find a way past the fear. And they go and they do their jobs on behalf of all of us. They go out, just like Congresswoman Giffords was doing yesterday, and they do their jobs...they serve the people....full well knowing the risks.

Sheriff Clarence Dupnik, the sheriff in the county where this happened, knows this.  I deeply appreciated words he said yesterday:

"When you look at unbalanced people, how they respond to the vitriol that comes out of certain mouths about tearing down the government. The anger, the hatred, the bigotry that goes on in this country is getting to be outrageous...That may be free speech. But it's not without consequences."

Our words are not without consequences, and to speak against hate speech is not hate speech. It does not incite violence to speak against violent speech. In fact, it is what God's justice calls us to. God calls us to speak against evil speech...to speak against unjust speech...to speak against the oppression of fear that causes so many not not speak up.

Through our faith in God, it is the calling of our baptism. Through our faith in God, it is the calling of our time.
Amen.

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My iPod's Most Listened-To Songs for 2010

It's become a tradition for me to reset the "number of plays" on the iPod/iTunes each Jan 1st and, come December 31st, to see where my ear has led me in the year that has passed.

Clearly, it was another awesome year in music. In years past, I have spent a lot of time on this blog, posting detailed links to each of these songs/performers. But it dawns on my, you're all big people with keyboards and access to "The Google." So knock yourself out.

You need to hear some of these folks, if you haven't already. And what follows is, best as I can look back and remember, why I heard them so much this year…

SONG                               ARTIST                      ALBUM

1. "Icarus Ascending"        Dan Fogelberg            Full Circle
Far and away, one of the highlights of my year was being invited by Jean Fogelberg and Deb Jelinek to be a part of the Fogelberg Weekend in Peoria. What an amazing, incredible gift. I was asked to be a part of an opening night party at the Hotel Pierre in downtown, as hundreds of Dan Fogelberg fans and friends from all over the country descended on that city for the dedication of a memorial to Dan. Peoria was his hometown, and many of the folks there that weekend knew Dan in high school, or played with him in his first band. Even got to meet his mom and brother.

Jean Fogelberg is such a lovely and generous soul. It was an amazing, amazing time. I could go on and on about it. I should. I should really finally write a blog about the weekend. This song was always a newer favorite of mine from Dan, but it took on special meaning that weekend, when the memorial was unveiled and the lyrics from this song provided the centerpiece for the whole thing.

Of course, the lines "There is no darkness in this place that we're bound…love is the only thing that matters" are in and of themselves poignant. But there's more. It turns out that Dan intended this song to be something of a tribute to artists everywhere who, like Icarus, risk it all to climb higher.

He wrote a description of the song that I find incredible powerful. You can read the whole thing here, and it's definitely worth reading. I heard this read twice during the weekend, and it deeply moved me each time.

Here's a sample. About this song:

"It's perhaps as close as I will ever come to really expressing my core philosophy. I'm not talking financial here, but spiritual rewards. Many great artists never realized financial rewards. This is a song to those artists, more than someone like me, who has had every reward I can possibly think of. So many great artists struggled all their lives and will never see the perks. This song says you have to have enormous courage to follow the muse and that's Icarus. The Greek story is one of the great stories of optimism and foolishness, that he would make wax wings to fly to the sun. But as an artist you've got to be fearless and keep flying to the sun even though you know you might crash. ' There is a gamble in each proud act of flight' is one of the best lines I've ever written.""

Something about these thoughts deeply moved me. It just felt like the song was speaking to me all through the weekend. I probably played it a million times on the way home.

I will never forget the scene in the hotel that night, as we played FOUR HOURS of continuous Dan Fogelberg music to hundreds of people. I will never forget the unbelievable moment of "Phoenix," where many of us musicians took the stage and played a song we'd *never* played as a group before. I'll never forget the joy on Jean Fogelberg's face as I could see her in the audience in that moment, the whole crowd literally jumping up and down. I will remember Kevin Yeargin playing this song on Dan's own Martin 12-string.

And I'll remember that ride home, filled with joy and listening to this song over and over.

2. "Fear Of Wasted Time"        Court Yard Hounds        Court Yard Hounds
Court Yard Hounds are 2/3rds of the Dixie Chicks. Man did I LOVE this CD this year. As you will see, several songs from the disk made it into the Top 25. That means I listened to it a lot. The production on the whole thing is just amazing. And I *love* the sound. Great, great songs. This one is the lilting closing track…an acknowledgment of time's passing and the fear that time is short. A song for us all to reflect on.

Poking around their website, I found this quote which seems to have inspired the name of the band, but also probably speaks to this song too. What a fantastic quote.

3. "All The More"                       Karyn Oliver            Red Dress
My dear friend Karyn Oliver, released her CD "Red Dress" this year. If you don't have it, you should. It's fantastic. She's a great, great writer. As you'll see, many of her songs make the list, because I just love the CD. This one is a real favorite. "All the More" is a really tender and kind song, addressed to a friend in need. A lovely sentiment, and a personal favorite. Brought me to tears the first time I heard it.

4. "So Many Changes"             Dan Fogelberg            Love In Time
I played this one a lot this year because I was trying to learn it. It's a great great lyric, and one that especially touched me, knowing that Dan no doubt recorded it while deep in the midst of his own life and death struggles with prostate cancer. The positive message is one that we all need to sing to ourselves, but hearing somebody in that position sing it to us is even more powerful:

"Do you think that it's wise
To be cursing the cloudy skies
Don't come to me with your cries
When the sun's shining in your eyes"

5. "Generous Friends"                K.C. Clifford                Orchid
K.C. gave me a copy of this CD at Kerrville in May, and it was one of the ones that captured me all the way home. Great to see her and David there, and to share some songs. This song is a benediction, really. The lyrics are an homage to the benediction in some contemporary wedding ceremonies. (It's very close to the words in the benediction of the ceremony in the current UM Hymnal…) A great, great song.

6. "When I Was In Love"             Bill Nash                Dreaming Again
I remember when Bill first wrote this song, and I'm really pleased he now has a recorded version to share with the world. It's won a couple of awards. Bill calls this is "forties torch song." The production is from Tom Prasado-Rao. And the song is all Bill. A great song from his long-awaited CD, "Dreaming Again." If you don't have it, you should. Bill: so happy that you put out this record!

7. "Not With My Jesus"                John Flynn                Dragon
I was sitting around the "Camp Kantigree" circle late one night, waiting to play, and John Flynn was just about to leave. Before he did, he played this song. My Lord. Add this to the "songs I wish I'd written." I was literally near tears at the end. An amazing and passionate defense of religion, against the extremists who would attempt to hijack it…told first from a Christian perspective, then from a Muslim one, and finally from God's. Powerful songwriting, and a word that need hearing.

8. "October Day"                          Karyn Oliver            Red Dress
9. "Right Now"                             Karyn Oliver            Red Dress
10. "Happy Hour"                          Karyn Oliver            Red Dress
Three more from Karyn's great new CD, "Red Dress." Did I mention that you should buy a copy? Well, you should. One of the great joys of life getting to hear songwriter friend's songs before they release them. My memories of this song are around our "Camp Nashbill" campfire, with dozens of people singing background vocals.
 "Right Now" is a song dripping with longing that really features Karyn's awesome voice.

"And I follow the tracks down 10th Street, to the Waterfront Hotel,
I write you only the good things, so that you'll know that I'm doing well."

Then later, perhaps my favorite lyric I have heard in new song during the past few years:

"I like the curve of your mouth,
I think I'd like the taste of your skin
And I like it when your done playing
You kinda smell like sin."

Whoa.

The may not have intended it (or maybe so) but the singable chorus of the last song, "Happy Hour," definitely describes Karyn. She's going places.
Maybe around the world.

11. "Red Cab to Manhattan"        Stephen Bishop            Red Cab to Manhattan
Midyear, one random FB status update from Neale Eckstein sent me on a quest to fill in the Stephen Bishop gaps on my iPod. Stephen is another of the songwriters buried deep back in the depths of my musical DNA. My copy of "Bish" (the vinyl) is so worn, I doubt it would even play anymore. That one random status update resulted in all the Bish songs you see on this list, and the quest to re-visit his music.

This song is from an album that didn't get a lot of play when it was released. There's something about it that's really haunting to me. It's melancholy and takes me back to a time when I'd broken up with a very serious girlfriend. I used to listen to this song over and over:

"My and my car broke down…
So I'm gonna take a red cab to Manhattan,
See "It's A Wonderful LIfe"
Take Jimmy Stewart out to dinner,
Buy some postcards for his wife."

12. "Come Home"                          Bill Nash                Dreaming Again
If you know Bill's music, you know his great song "Come Home." Which many of us count as our favorite Bill Nash song, and which is one of my favorite Christmas songs. A couple of years ago, Bill had the idea to re-write some lyrics and with a few simple changes, found that it was now a lovely song about Kerrville. I have SO many memories of this song…of singing it around the camp at Kerrville…of singing it in groups so many places…it's a really great Kerrville song.

13. "I'd Lend You"                          Bill Nash                Dreaming Again
This is a haunting spoken word piece from Bill. Bill, as most will know, has MS. He's fought it for years. Bill doesn't directly talk about his MS all the time, but this is as raw as it gets. The poetry here…the heartfelt truth of life….is beautiful. I had to listen over and over.

14. "Look Out Any Window"        Bruce Hornsby            Greatest Radio Hits (Remastered)
I'm really not sure why, but something called me back to Bruce Hornsby this year. You know, the guy's an amazing musician…toured with The Dead….plays killer jazz piano. Many of his songs have a biting social conscience….something I always admire in a song. This is traveling music…driving down the highway at 75, belting it out at the top of your lungs….and hopefully living it, not just singing it.

15. "One Step Up"                         Bruce Springsteen            Tunnel of Love
Among the other old songs I was drawn back to this year was this one. I used to love to play this one on guitar, and still do. Wanted to re-learn it. A powerful, honest song from a guy who writes a whole lot of them.

16. "Howl At The Moon"              Cheryl Wheeler            Mrs. Pinocci's Guitar
I spent several lovely nights this summer, walking in moonlight. And although I sang and remembered many moon-songs this year, there's no better one than this one, in my estimation.

17. "Delight"                                  Court Yard Hounds        Court Yard Hounds
18. "See You In The Spring"        Court Yard Hounds        Court Yard Hounds
Two more from the Court Yard Hounds. Did I mention that I LOVE this CD? Damn, it's good. Delight (Something New Under the Sun) is an amazing and driving song. If you had any doubts, this song will convince you, that this is not your cousin Louise's Dixie Chicks. This is something new under the sun. And I love it.

See you in the Spring is an amazing duet with Jakob Dylan. Many duets are really just glorified background vocal appearances. *This* song was clearly written, and is sung, as a dialogue between two lovers caught between the cold of Chicago and the heat of San Antonio. Just a fine, fine song that will capture you quickly.

May I just say that those two can write some amazing songs.

19. "Ever On"                                Dan Fogelberg               The Wild Places
Another one from Dan. Another older one. I think I played this one a lot on the way up to Peoria. Generally, I think "The Wild Places" was a vastly under-rated CD. To me, it's one of the better starting places to understand Dan's music, especially in the later years. "Ever On" is a marvelous prayer. It sort of plays off of the famous "Old Irish Blessing," but is also clearly more rooted in Native American spirituality. It's a lovely, lovely prayer.

20. "If I Only Had a Brain"             Stephen Bishop        Bish
21. "What Love Can Do"                 Stephen Bishop        Bish
22. "Only the Heart Within You"    Stephen Bishop        Bish
Three more from Bish, and all from that great, great CD of the same name. You know, it strikes me, this might be one of the last CDs to really utilize full orchestration for the production. I mean, today, almost nobody does that…it's all keyboards. Fogelberg did it. And so did Bish. The lushness of "If I Only Had a Brain" will capture you quickly.

"What Love Can Do" is just a bizarre song, and I *love* it. It makes no sense it all, and that's what makes it great. A tribute to the great songwriter Yip Harburg (who wrote some of the great songs from the Wizard of Oz).

"Only the Heart Within You" is one of my all-time favorite songs. I know I listened to this one a lot this year so I could relearn it.

23. "Knocks Me Off My Feet"        Stevie Wonder        At The Close Of A Century [Disc 3)
24. "Pastime Paradise"                    Stevie Wonder        At The Close Of A Century [Disc 3)
Have I mentioned that Stevie Wonder is a musical genius? Our current band show is a tribute to him. And so, I spent a lot of time listening to a lot of Stevie this year in the car. Actually, mostly on CD. However, I was inspired to download "Songs in the Key of LIfe" which I consider to be the first "real" album I ever bought with my own $$.

My God, it's genius. How do you even begin to describe it? These two songs are NOT in the show, but are two of my personal faves. Of course, Pastime Paradise lives in in its remixed form. "Knocks Me Off My Feet" is such a plain, yet genuine love song…and wet kiss  to the four season (the real ones, not the group). I used to sing this one at the top of my lungs when I was a kid.

25. "From Above"                             Ben Folds            From Above
Somebody posted on FB that this was a great song. I'd never heard it, but I downloaded it, and obviously listened quite a lot.

"Who knows whether that's how it should be
Maybe a ghost lived in that vacancy
Maybe that's how books get written
Maybe that's why songs get sung
Maybe we are the unlucky ones"

Whoa.
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Well, that's it. This year's list. Quite a fun mix of folks I know and folks I admire…brand new songs from brand new folks, and old songs from waaaay back in my musical dan.

Hope you find something worth listening to. I highly recommend doing this. All you have to do is to into iTunes today and reset the play count. Then, just enjoy the music normally and see where the iPod leads this year.

(As always, if you like this post, then "like" this on Facebook by clicking the box below, so others can see too...)

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